Life Goes On

I've had good days and bad days since Meme passed.  Thankfully mostly good days.  For some reason the last couple of days have been difficult.  I'm not sure why, the dates aren't significant to anything having to do with her.  I know she's better off and in a better place, so this feeling will pass eventually.

My hip is still bothering me.  It's much better than it was the last time I mentioned it, and I don't notice it much when I get in the car (last week the pain was excruciating to get in the car), but it still bothers me when I get in bed, wake up in the middle of the night for a bathroom run, and get back in bed.  I have to watch how I lay in the bed to keep it from hurting, and typically have to put a pillow between my knees if I sleep on the side that doesn't hurt.  Walking doesn't bother it, but the stooping and bending still let me know something's off in the hip.  I remembered the other day that my hip would ache all night when we'd g…


I'm waiting on a lot of things tonight.

I'm waiting on my beloved husband to make it home from work (the work truck broke down on I-285 by Ashford-Dunwoody and the tow truck is on the way)

I'm waiting for my damn hip to stop hurting.  Apparently sleeping in a different bed this past weekend, combined with lifting, dragging, and pushing lots of somewhat heavy things in Hampton has wreaked havoc on my left hip joint.  It has gotten better since Sunday, but it's quite aggravating at this point.  At least I can sit and squat now without much discomfort, but bending over sends pain from my hip joint all the way down my leg.  Sunday it was excruciating to the point I actually considered going to the emergency department (you know it's bad if I consider the ED).  It's gradually gotten more tolerable, but tonight's it's kinda aching and burning, and nothing I do seems to relieve the pain.  The pain level is only maybe a 4 out of 10, but it's enough to be ve…

Unbelievable.....But Not Really

I went to Hampton this weekend, to assist my mother and my uncle in going through Meme's things.  Our goal was to clear out her bedroom closet, and as much of the clothing related items that we could.  I already had an idea of the daunting task that we were facing, but I honestly don't think that my mother or uncle had a clue of just how "bad" it would be. 

The bedroom that was Meme's has a closet that's about 3' x 3'.  The wire hanging racks were loaded down with clothing, and the top rack was packed, and the floor was piled up to the bottom of the clothing with boxes and crates.  We worked on this closet for about 4-5 hours and got everything cleared out of it yesterday.  My uncle took 3-4 trips to Goodwill with everything from that closet.

Today we worked on the spare bedroom.  There was only a narrow path through the room to the closet, due to all the boxes, chairs, and other miscellaneous items.  She had 2 rolling racks FULL of clothes against t…

In Remembrance of Meme

We laid Meme to rest yesterday.  It was an absolutely beautiful day, not too warm, not too cool, sun was shining bright, just gorgeous - a perfect day for a graveside service.  The preacher that performed the service spoke in such a positive manner, and there were a few laughs as well.  

Meme had such a beautiful life, and in talking with the preacher on Thursday afternoon I learned a few things about her, too.  We shared many laughs, and many tears, in talking with the preacher.  And Meme looked so good.  We were able to have a private family-only viewing on Thursday, and she looked just like the "old" Meme.  I was worried because I didn't want my last visions of her to be the ones from the last time I had seen her at the hospital, and I couldn't have been more pleased with how she looked.  So peaceful, so beautiful, and in no more pain.

Thank you so much to all of you for your thoughts and prayers, to those of you who have reached out privately, who have commented on…

Another Funny About Meme

I've been trying to remember all of the funny things that I've experienced in my life that have to do with Meme, and unfortunately a lot of it is blocked from my memories for now.  I imagine there's just so much on my mind with her impending passing, and it's making it hard to remember all the good times. 

In her honor, I've cooked 2 of my favorite cookies that she used to make - cocoa drop cookies, and tea cake cookies.  The cocoa cookies are good, but aren't quite like hers, and the tea cake cookies are nothing like hers.  They're good, but they're not hers.  :-(

I was thinking about posting some photos of Meme on Facebook, and I will probably get around to posting a memorial album with photos of her over the years, but it jogged my memory of when Meme first found out I got a tattoo.  I got my first tattoo when I was 39, in either January or February of that year.  I hid it from my mom until she saw it by accident, and I made sure I kept it hidden fr…

Lazy Saturday

Today has been a somewhat lazy day.  Went running around town, baked some cocoa drop cookies (Meme's recipe), and fixed creamy chicken enchiladas for dinner.

I took Steven to see Meme yesterday.  That was a lot tougher than I had imagined it would be.  She was asleep the entire time we were there, The doctors are keeping her medicated with morphine to keep her comfortable.  She was peaceful for the majority of the time we were there, but she started making these horrible moaning sounds, like she was crying out.  I stroked her hair and talked to her, and she would settle down.  She had a few spells like that and then was quiet. 

Before we left, Steven and I both told Meme things that we appreciated about her, and that we loved her.  Steven mentioned how he learned to love Krystals due to all the times she took him there, and she started moving her mouth in a rigid fashion, like she was either trying to talk, or perhaps she was acting like she was eating.  It was kinda funny, but i…

The Latest with Meme

Meme had the surgery Tuesday to remove part of her intestines to try to get the bleeding to stop.  The breathing tube was removed yesterday, and she was awake, breathing on her own just fine.  And raising hell about being "chained to the bed" all night, with the door chained shut and plastic wrapped.  The old Meme was back!

Unfortunately the news today is not so good.  She had a massive bleed while sitting in the recliner, and has had 2-3 smaller bleeds since.  The doctors have told the family that there is nothing else that can be done, other than to keep her comfortable.  No more medications other than comfort meds, no more needle sticks, no more transfusions. 

There's a teeny tiny extremely small possibility that with her strong will and desire to live forever (I have to lol at that - she always refused to talk about dying, funeral plans, etc., as if she always thought she'd live forever), that she could rally and stop bleeding like she did last time. 

She will …