Wednesday, April 25, 2012


I know, I know, it's been a while since I've posted anything meaningful, entertaining, or useful.  There's a lot of reasons for that - exhaustion, lack of motivation, busy, and I just don't plain feel like it.  I've had a lot of things to say and to share, but for one reason or another, I just haven't bothered sharing.  I don't even know that I can remember it all now in order to be able to share it.  So tonight's entry will likely be random and all over the place.

Had my first nightmare about my trip to England Monday night.  Dreamed that I left our tickets at home, and Delta couldn't find our names on any flights.  We were traveling with a man, I don't recall who, seemed like maybe my dad or my brother Robert, I honestly have no idea.  I was frustrated, and trying to think of everything to tell them how to find us, so that we wouldn't miss our flight.  I do remember going through part of the airport afterwards, hoping they'd let us on a flight, and this airport was quite interesting.  Seems like I've had dreams about this particular airport before, but it's been a while and I don't remember much about the previous dreams.  I woke up before we got anywhere. :-(

One of my OCD quirks is kicking in pretty hard right now.  I feel silly sharing it but I've heard of other people having the same quirk - obsessing about getting papercuts on my eyeballs and/or eyelids - and this feeling is quite intense this week.  Go ahead, I figure some of you will make fun of me but I don't care - this is what it is.  Too bad my OCD doesn't have to do with something useful like housekeeping!  LOL  I know it's stress related - there's a lot going on in my life right now - and these weird feelings won't stop until the stress is relieved, one way or another.  A lot of my stress is work related - I'm not going to go into details, but there's a lot of stuff happening at work that is stressing me out. 

Other stressors - trip to England - I am SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO excited to be going, but there's so much I want to do and get done before I leave, both personally and work-related, and it's stressful.  I need to sit down and plan out the next 26 days.  OMG only 26 days!!!!

I am house-hunting.  That is stressful in and of itself.   I've put an offer in on a house and am waiting to hear if it was accepted by the seller.  Might know something tomorrow some time.  Regardless of how it turns out, th gym will be a great outlet for the stress tomorrow afternoon - work off the disappointment if we don't get it, or the excitement if we do.  I'm resolved to accept either outcome - what is meant to be, will be.  I really like this one - it's in a nice neighborhood, in a good area, and Steven would be going to a school that is ranked much higher in the state than where he currently goes.

My puppies got out Monday morning - they were gone from the house for over an hour.  Ms Clydie called me to come help her, that she'd driven the neighborhood and looked everywhere she knew to look, and didn't see them.  I raced out of the office, called Michael and asked him to come help, and when I got home we went out searching in different directions.  I rode through the older part of the trailer park, then I rode over to the dump, thinking maybe the boys had gone through the hole in the fence to track or chase some deer or other wildlife that pass through there.  I stopped at the dump office and asked them to call me if they saw them at the dump, and their security guard said he'd seen them about an hour earlier at a neighborhood down the street. 

I rode to the neighborhood next to the one he mentioned, and asked a man that was working out by the street if he'd seen them.  He'd also seen them in that neighborhood, but he said he saw 2 men in a white truck stopped by them, and assumed they'd picked them up.  My heart sank - deep and fast - as I drove to that neighborhood.  I started weeping as I drove through there, thinking about where they could be, if those men had picked them up, if they'd run further, if they were hurt......truly depressed, I drove towards my house, and my phone rang as I drove through my neighborhood - it was the lady at the dump - the boys were running down the railroad tracks across from the dump entrance!  I floored it out of the trailer park, down the road, passing Ms Clydie  like she was standing still - I flew over to the railroad tracks by the dump - about a mile away from the house - and got out of the car.

The dump lady called me again to tell me that the pups were on the tracks when she'd seen them  a minute earlier, and they were running towards Hampton.  I walked over to the tracks and could see them about 200 yards down from me.  I started calling their names, running towards them, and they turned around to look at me.  They hesitated for a minute, then they came running to me.  I grabbed Gabriel's collar, but Dominion wouldn't let me get his, he just ran back towards where I had parked.  Gabriel struggled so much that I picked him up and toted him for a bit, then had to put him down.  Dominion had disappeared between the semi-trucks that were parked near my car, and I hoped and prayed that he was waiting by my car - and he was!  I was so happy to have found my babies!

And of course all the stress I've had lately, combined with the fact that it's about PMS time, means my acne is flaring pretty badly.  I'm almost 44 freaking years old, yet I still get acne.  You'd think the tanning bed would dry that shit up, but nope, it doesn't.  I started using a new lotion, and I'm wondering it that might be what's contributing to the acne I'm getting on my chest.  It doesn't explain what I'm getting on my back or my face and neck, but who knows.  Guess I need to check and see if it's one of those that's not supposed to cause acne, or not, and perhaps stop using it on my chest. 

Anyways  it's only 10pm and I'm already showered and ready for bed.  Call Ripley's!

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